About Bonnie Neubauer

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Bonnie Neubauer is an author, inventor, and telemarketing consultant who resides in suburban Philadelphia, PA with her husband, Gil; two cats, Booger and Coolio; and a lot of clutter.

This page is now going to shift into first person as she (er, I mean I) prefers to NOT write about herself in the third person!

I was born June 29, 1958 in Philadelphia, PA to Arnie and Sandy Neubauer. Back in those days Dads paced waiting rooms and, in delivery, Moms were knocked out cold. After I was all cleaned up, the nurse brought me in to meet my brown-haired parents. When they saw a baby with a full head of thick, curly bright red-orange hair, my Mom exclaimed, "That's our baby?" And so my life began.

Three years later, my reign as spoiled first grandchild and only child ended. My sister Hope was born. She had straight, fine blonde hair. But by now my parents were used to miracles! We pretty much fought from the minute my mom started to show. Three years after that, our sister Kim was born. Finally, a brown-haired baby! And Hope and I had something real to fight over - Kim's attention.

I was an early talker, starting with phrases and shifting quickly to full sentences. I have not shut up since - just ask Gil. Words and language have played a major role in my existence. So have games.

As a kid I was very into playing: cards, board games (especially Mystery Date, Clue, Yahtzee, and Scrabble) string figures, puzzles, word games, tag, Chinese jump rope, and school (I was always the student - what a sucker) with my best friend Melinda. I never understood dolls. Barbie only became interesting when my friends and I locked her nude in the case with GI Joe. I did, however, think the idea of using straight pins for earrings was pretty clever. I still love having games nights with friends and family where we play Balderdash, Scattergories, Pictionary, Loaded Questions, and prototypes of the games I invent. And when I should be working, I sometimes play solitaire or pinball on the computer. (Okay, more than sometimes.)

In school I was a really good student, teacher's Pet on occasion, always the goody-two-shoes. I went to a wonderful Kindergarten through 8th grade school called Finletter ELementary. Our 25-year 8th grade reunion was a blast. Not one of us looked a day over 13. I hope someone is going to organize a 35-year reunion.

I have always been very impressed with humor. Alan Sherman (of Hello Muddah, Hello Faddah fame) was a staple in our household. We STILL pull out the old vinyl LPs and sing along. (Don't forget to factor in that I was one of 2 girls in my elementary school class not chosen for chorus.) I also adored Carol Burnett. If I could have been any character in a TV show, I would have chosen Rhoda - both in her self-deprecating, frumpy side-kick to Mary Tyler Moore days, as well as in her svelte, sharp-tongued, own-series days.

Fast forward now: High School was OK. One highlight was my adulation for Harry Chapin. The first 2 years of college were all right. Then, in my Junior Year, I lived in France with a fantastic program from Rutgers University. Every minute was an exciting learning experience or at worst, a 20-pound weight gaining culinary experience.

I paid a lot of my way through school by working retail jobs where I sold everything from shoes to vitamins to toilet seats. I attended one year of graduate school where I studied Sociolinguistics. If you're wondering "What's that? What do you do with it?" I asked myself the same thing one morning and dropped out shortly thereafter. I then had careers in apartment management, advertising sales, telemarketing, consulting. Nothing jazzed me. Nothing ignited my passion.

Then, in the midst of a very dark, phobic, depressed part of my life, during a telemarketing sales call, I met a man named Randy Rosler who had just started a business-to-business greeting card company. Something clicked (and no, it was NOT call waiting) and out-of-the-blue I knew from the bottom of my being that I wanted to write greeting cards for him. After a bit of out-of-character persistence from me, he agreed. Three days later I sold him 12 card concepts.

THAT WAS WHEN I CAUGHT THE WRITING BUG! The only 'D' I had ever gotten in all my years of school was in Freshman English Composition. What a surprising shock to my system to find out my niche in the world had to do with writing.

I immediately started reading more fiction, reading about writing (my favorite books on the subject are by Natalie Goldberg) and actually writing. I wrote resumes for friends and family, hundreds more greeting cards, telemarketing sales scripts, ghost-written articles, handouts for public speakers, scripts for seminars, advertisements, catalog copy (my favorite was for a company that sold erotic chocolates) and brochures.

I also loved timed-writing exercises and the magical pieces they prompt me to create. So much energy in such a short period of time... never knowing what's going to come out of my pen... like being an armchair adventurer. I started attending workshops using this technique. I even have a novel, Carly's Diary (2/3 done), that has been written using this method.

Before I knew it, I was leading the workshops. I developed my own style using lots of sensory stimulation, visual prompts, combining unlikely subjects, and not knowing your topic until right before you pick up the pen to write for 10 minutes. Watching a new writer catch the spark is a magnificent moment. Helping a writer get unblocked is a gift. Some folks turned their exercises into published stories and articles. Everyone kept mentioning how they wished they had these types of exercises to do at home.

I thought about writing a book of exercises but that seemed daunting. Then I remembered a toy I had as a child where you turn wheels that interchange parts of characters faces to make funny and weird-looking people. I used that premise to come up with my first invention, Story Spinner, which is 3 handheld wheels that generate millions of creative writing exercises. I have a whole line of other creativity-stimulating products in the works. Right now most are in the cut and paste prototype stage scattered on the floor of my office. Once Story Spinner turns (pun intended) a profit, I will begin to market them.

The biggest challenge I met with Story Spinner was that it wasn’t a book. All the retailers and catalogers liked it, but wanted it to be in a traditional form so they could sell it easier. Even though years earlier I had thought that writing a book of exercises was too overwhelming, I did it anyway. Two agents and many rejection letters later, that book is actually a reality. (A big thank-you to my fantastic agent, Jennifer DeChiara, and the wonderful folks at F+W Pubs/Writer’s Digest Books.) The title is Write-Brain Workbook, 366 exercises to liberate your writing . Look for it at your favorite bookseller starting in December 2005. I am really proud of it. And it is the first of many books to come.

In the middle of all this creativity, I also have a life that revolves around books. I actually met my husband at a bookstore and, (at the age of 41 for me, 36 for him) on April 2, 2000 we were married at the Borders Books and Music Store in Springfield, PA where we met. Gil wore a kilt and I wore a bright red gown for our "storybook" non-traditional wedding. It was on 2 TV stations and written up in all the local papers and even appeared in a national women's magazine. (The best part was the color-corrected photo that made my usual pasty, white face look tan!)

As I write this on March 20, 2005, I’d like to share my current dream: To have my dear agent sell my next three books: Picnics for Romantics, Solidare, and Punny Costumes for lots and lots and lots of money. I will then buy the mini-motor home for which I’ve been lusting and take off with Gil on a huge book tour across all of North America. It is so exciting to imagine that the entire continent will be our backyard. One day soon you may find us knocking at your door asking if we can plug in for the night in exchange for a free Story Spinner. I hope you’ll say yes and become part of our adventure.

Until then, I leave you with this quote by Henny Youngman: “Triumph is just oomph added to try.” Go ahead and take that first (or next) step and do what you’ve been dreaming. I did (and still do) and it feels great to wake up every morning knowing I am living my dreams and sharing them with you.

Happy creating!
-Bonnie

Here’s a HEADSHOT photo of me taken by my dear friend, Anne Knoll www.knollphotos.com. Please let me know if you need a copy for promotional purposes.

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